Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails

1 I Might Have G…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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It’s kind of difficult to try and put yourself in any of these people’s shoes. But apparently, a lot of people are in the same situation. If you happen to get your girlfriend pregnant, you need to immediately go to Google. Maybe she doesn’t know yet, and you are trying to figure out how to tell her. Or maybe you gave someone an STI… Why not reach out to Google for help?

Google even knows what to do when you might have “girlbossed” too close to the sun. You know, it’s hard out here for women these days. They still have to work twice as hard as men, and it can end up going a different direction than they intended.

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2 Can My R…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Serious questions here, y’all. Can your resume be two pages? What about three pages? Google knows. But to be serious, can your relationship be saved? Google is the cheapest therapist on the market. It’s free! But the info you receive won’t be something to call home about. But it’s worth a try!

Google also has the answer for when you might be afraid that your roommate is going to kick you out. Can they even do that to you? What if you have nowhere else to go? What would you do then? Or do you know what kinds of fruits and vegetables your rabbit can eat? Google does!

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3 Can A Person…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Are you feeling a little bit lonely? Maybe your partner recently left you, and you are feeling down about yourself. Well, Google can help. All you have to do is search “Can a person die from a broken heart?” You probably aren’t the only person feeling this way, since it did autocomplete. But you may find some advice on how to get through it.

Oh, and Google might be able to help if you’re missing an organ or if you’re allergic to water. You never know what might cause you to end up with only one of two organs, so it is better to be prepared now.

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4 I Think I Might Be…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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We think we know what these Google searches mean. Have you ever taken a test to self-diagnose yourself with something like anxiety or depression? Google is filled with all kinds of tests and articles to better help you understand these disorders.

But we don’t think Google is qualified enough to diagnose you with any of these conditions. Especially if you are pregnant. There are other tests that you should take to help you determine if you are pregnant or not. Google doesn’t quite have that capability.

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5 What Happens When…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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When you are little, your parents tell you that if you swallow a watermelon seed, a watermelon will grow in your stomach. So, what happens when you swallow gum? Google knows! It also knows what could happen when you fail or even die.

You may have heard about the gum myth as well. It’s always been said that if you swallow gum, it stays in your system for 7 years. But is that really true? How could Google know all of this information? The world may never know! I mean, I think we all know where the information comes from, but it’s fun to pretend!

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6 Is It Wrong To M…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Ah, the age-old question, is it wrong to marry your cousin? What about your second cousin? Where else would you go besides Google to answer all of life’s ethical questions for you? If you are asking if it is wrong to marry your cousin, then it is probably wrong.

There are so many other people in the world to be in a relationship with, maybe choose one that you aren’t related to. That will save you and your partner some seriously awkward questions at the wedding. To answer another question, no, we do not think it is wrong to miss your ex. It’s natural, but maybe you can find a way to move on.

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7 Why Is My D…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Any dog owner knows that dogs can do unpredictable things at any moment. You never know what they will put in their mouth, so you must be vigilant at all times. When it comes to questions about your dog, Google is the first place to go. Don’t you want to find out if it could potentially be serious? Also, Google knows what to do if your dryer isn’t getting hot.

Even if you are having some odd things coming out of your body, you can use Google to help determine the cause. There are so many questions, even if they are a little odd, that Google can help you with!

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8 Why Am I Sc…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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You know, people are scared of many, many things these days. Sometimes, it can even be hard to grow out of your childhood fears. So, if you find yourself with a fear of the dark, just use Google to help you overcome those fears. Or if you are scared of things like talking to others, relationships, sleeping, or just literally everything, you can find solace with Google.

Google understands those fears! You might even be able to find others that are in the same position as you. Maybe someone else is just scared. They don’t even know what they are scared of, they just know they’re scared.

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9 Why Can’t I…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Why would you go to the doctor when you have Google right at your fingertips? Nothing feels better than finally understanding what is wrong with yourself. Except, you probably will not diagnose yourself correctly. I mean, unless you have a medical background, you probably have no clue what you are doing.

But you might end up finding a specialist that will aid you in whatever is wrong, which is definitely better than finding some random article trying to tell you what the problem is. Let’s be honest, most people are probably going to read that article instead of seeing a doctor.

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10 Why Do I…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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If you are asking these questions, chances are you should probably see a specialist. I mean, something could be seriously wrong with you. To be honest, many of these symptoms sound like a hangover, but if you experience these every day, maybe someone other than Google should be helping you.

Even though Google is the first place that everyone goes to ask their questions, many people do not go further than that. They stop once they have decided what they want to be wrong with them, instead of getting professional advice.

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11 Do Men…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Maybe women just have a hard time understanding why men do what they do. To be honest, do they even understand themselves? For all we know, men are the ones Googling these questions about themselves. We knew toxic masculinity was a real thing, but Google autocomplete continues to prove to us that men are terrified of being perceived as feminine. Oh, what the world has come to!

Seriously, though, did science classes fail us? Why are people asking these questions? How do they not know? Google, we know you have all of the answers, but these are things that everyone should already know.

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12 I Think I Might Have S…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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We just have to ask, are these people alright? Some of these questions seem pretty intense. Like, maybe you should see a therapist kind of intensity… But that is just us. If you search for any of these questions, you definitely need to see some kind of doctor.

We don’t think Google will be able to give you the help that you obviously need. Did you happen to swallow some glass? What is Google going to tell you? We think it’ll probably say that you need to go to the emergency room immediately. Glass in your intestines probably is not going to feel good, and could do some serious damage if you ask us. But what do we know?

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13 How Do I Get Rid Of A…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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These are the kind of questions that are somewhat alright to ask Google. Many of these issues can be treated with a home remedy. So, Google will show you the most popular articles that will help you with your problem. Some of these, though, might need a little more than a “how-to” article.

For example, if you have a stuffy nose or a sore throat, there are some over-the-counter medications that Google might recommend for you. But if you have a virus on your phone, there is only so much that Google can do for you.

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14 How Do I Tell My…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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If you are having trouble trying to decide if you should tell your pets if you love them or not, just do it. They probably aren’t going to understand what you are saying to them, anyway. All they know is that you are giving them some attention. Which is literally all they want in life.

If you can’t decide if you should tell your crush that you love them, you should just tell them as well. What’s the worst that could happen? They don’t say it back? Then, nothing changes! You can just move on! It’s easier said than done, but still.

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15 Who Would Win In A Fight Between…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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We have all seen some sort of superhero movie in our lifetime. When we go to the movie theatre to watch them, we typically have a favorite character that we are rooting for. But what if there hasn’t been a movie with the characters that you want to see in a battle yet?

That is when you go to Google! Even if you aren’t curious about movie characters, you can figure out who would win between anyone or anything! Like a grizzly bear and a polar bear! Or a bear and a tiger! Who wouldn’t want to see them in a fight with each other?

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16 What If I Don’t M…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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A lot of these questions could be easily answered using Google, but asking it why you don’t miss your girlfriend? Maybe you should take a step back and take a look at your relationship. If you don’t miss her, you should probably end things. It is really better for everyone.

And if you don’t match, that is ok too! Sometimes it is fun when you don’t match your outfits every day. People might look at you like you are weird, but who cares? As long as you are happy, right? That is all that matters!

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17 Is It Rude To E…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Google is the perfect place to go if your parents neglected to teach you basic manners. Are you aware that it is impolite to eat with your elbows on the table? Well, Google will tell you. We all know that it can be fun to eavesdrop sometimes, but yes, it is rude.

Google can also teach you about email etiquette. Sometimes it is hard to decipher whether or not you should send your professor an email at a certain time. So, apparently, Google will tell you if it’s ok or not. Perfect!

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18 Why Is He…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Did you recently go on a date with a guy who is now ignoring you? That’s ok, Google will tell you why that is! Google knows everything, especially about how relationships work. Just look at these questions that people frequently ask. If they weren’t getting answers, would it still autocomplete to these questions?

Google can also tell you why people have certain names, in case you were curious. Which, we know that there are plenty of people who would like to know due to the fact that they popped up. No matter what question you may have, you can always go to Google!

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19 Does My…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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You can never really be sure if someone loves you or not. So why not ask Google? Clearly, Google knows exactly why someone would love you. Now, we aren’t sure what it is going to tell you, though. Maybe Google will give you some advice on how to make someone love you. If that even works.

If you are asking if your dog or cat loves you, just assume that they do. I mean, don’t they love everyone? Granted, it may take some pets a little time to warm up to someone, but as soon as they do, they will love you.

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20 When Will I W…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Want to know when you will win the lottery? Do you buy lottery tickets frequently? Google might be able to help determine the odds of you winning big! You never know, you could be the person that wins the biggest lottery ever, then, you would never have to work again!

Even if you want to know if you will walk again, Google will tell you. We aren’t sure if it will be able to help you better than your doctor can, but it might give you some hope. Google can also tell you if you will want to have a baby or even date again.

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21 How Can She N…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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These are some pretty deep questions, even for Google. The people asking them probably aren’t doing too well right now. They are in love and miss someone who doesn’t feel the same way about them. But that is ok. They sought out help from Google, the #1 recommended relationship expert!

We also want to let you know that if you are asking Google if people can tell that you are pregnant, you should probably see your doctor. Because if people don’t know right now, they are definitely going to know pretty soon. I mean, you can’t hide this forever.

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22 What Do I Do If The…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Is your toilet clogged? Did your toilet overflow? Why should you call a plumber when you have Google? It is basically the same thing, right? Well, it isn’t like Google can fix it for you, but it might give you some advice on how to fix it yourself! Isn’t that so much easier?

Who cares about hiring a professional when you have yourself? You might save time and money if you did hire someone who knew what they were doing, but it’s all about the experience! What if this were to happen again? You wouldn’t want to be stuck relying on someone else!

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23 Will I Ever…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Well, if you went to Google for that first search query, you might need more than a book. We have seen enough movies and TV shows to know that these problems need to be worked through with a professional. And if you are searching for some of these other questions, you should still seek out some professional advice elsewhere.

Google has millions of articles, so you might be able to find something that relates to your situation. Like, if you will ever get a ps5. It will probably tell you the price and where to purchase one. It might even tell you all of the pros and cons of owning this specific gaming console!

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24 Why Can’t I Stop…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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People do things all the time for no reason, like using Google as their own personal doctors and therapists. Maybe you are sick and don’t have the time to go to the doctor. So, instead, you opt to use Google to diagnose yourself. All we are saying is the time you spent scrolling through hundreds of articles would have been better spent in an actual doctor’s office.

But if you can’t stop thinking about someone, Google is the perfect place to go. You will find self-help articles that will give you something else to think about instead of that person. Maybe you’ll go down a rabbit hole of articles and end up reading something about actual rabbits. Now, doesn’t that help get your mind off of someone? We think so!

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25 Why Does My…

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Did you know you can get award-winning medical advice straight from Google itself? It is true, people have been doing it for years! Besides the incredibly accurate diagnosis, you can also use Google to search for things that might actually tell you what is wrong with something.

Like technology! We think using Google to understand technological issues is much more useful. For example, if your Firestick keeps buffering and turning itself off, you will be able to better understand what is wrong with it. It might also tell you that you need a completely new one, but that is still an answer!

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26 Can I Still Be…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Yes. Yes, you can still be drunk the next day. If you plan on going out drinking, make sure that you do not have any important plans the next day. Or, maybe, have some self-control so you don’t end up drunk while you are in a meeting with your boss the next day. Just a thought!

But on a more serious note, can you be pregnant while you are on your period? Google knows just what to tell you. It also knows what to tell you if you think you can still be drafted. You may not want to know the answer, but Google has one for you either way.

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27 How Can I St…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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A lot of times, couples will get into arguments due to the fact that one person snores every night. They get irritated and annoyed because their partner’s snoring is stopping them from getting any sleep. So, the person who snores will take it upon themselves to try and figure out how they can stop doing that. Clearly, many people have that issue.

But if you have pain or something weird happening when you use the restroom, Google might not be the best place to go for that. Doctors are the only people who would be able to diagnose you and help you with whatever problem you are having.

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28 Can I Eat…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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I’m sure you have all pulled something out of the refrigerator and wondered if you could still eat it past its expiration date, but that is not exactly what people are searching for. Apparently, pregnant women have no idea what they are allowed to consume. So, straight to Google it is! Where else would you get your diet information from?

And if you are wondering if you can eat someone else’s internal organs, you can Google that as well. But we don’t advise that you try and consume pieces of another human being. First of all, that is gross. Second of all, you might have some serious issues if you are trying to do that.

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29 Sometimes I B…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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Do you “be” in a mood sometimes? It doesn’t matter what kind of mood that is, because Google will help you understand. But isn’t everyone in some sort of mood all of the time? You can be happy, sad, upset, or angry, among many other things.

Google even knows what to tell you when you burp and food comes up. Sure, it isn’t very fun when it happens, but hasn’t it happened to many people? That is probably why it came up as an answer for this search. It’s ok, we won’t judge you.

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30 Why Do My…

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You can never take medical advice from just one doctor, right? You should always get a second opinion. That is what any average person would do, anyway. But who says you have to get a second opinion from a licensed professional? I mean, Google can do that for you. Obviously, so many others feel the same way. You probably won’t get the correct diagnosis, but who cares?!

As long as you are happy with the answer that Google has for you, that’s all that matters, right? Even if that answer is completely wrong. Either way, we think that you should go to a professional to get your second (or first) opinions.

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31 I Accidentally A…

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Ok, but seriously, these are somewhat realistic questions. They are not serious enough to do something about just yet, so you obviously go to Google first. If you accidentally ate mold or raw chicken, it might be a good idea to see a doctor because you may get extremely sick. But who accidentally eats guns? How is that even possible?

But, on the bright side, if you accidentally archive an email, Google is just the place to go! You will probably find a step-by-step guide on how to fix your problem. What’s better than that? Google won’t be able to give you good advice on what to do if you swallow a gun, but it can help if you archive an email.

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32 I Hate It When…

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There are so many things that people tend to hate. Those things can include your dog melting. Who doesn’t hate when that happens? Or, when you accidentally summon a lemon, that is the absolute worst. But possibly one of the worst things to happen is when your husband is home.

Don’t you hate that? Like, doesn’t he have something better to do? All you want is your alone time! Is that too much to ask for? But don’t you hate it when Jesus rides a velociraptor? Or when chinchillas eat the universe? Geez!

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33 Am I A…

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What better place to go to than Google to understand what kind of person you are? Obviously, Google knows everything. If you are worried about being a sociopath, you should probably see a therapist. Though we don’t think Google will be able to help much with that. But are you a Nicki fan? Pull up in the Sri Lanka, what? Maybe that’s why you’re searching if you are a Nicki fan.

Google can also tell you if you are a toxic person. Even though being toxic is probably subjective, Google might give you some examples of what traits a “toxic” person portrays. You might even be able to find out if you are a republican or democrat. Google can tell you exactly who you are!

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34 What Would I L…

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Are you craving a new hairstyle? Maybe you are itching to change your appearance. We understand! We have been there, too. Every once in a while, it is important to change your look in order to maintain your sanity. That is where Google comes in!

Maybe it will help you find an app that will create a new look for you. The possibilities are endless! You can even see what you would look like if you had a beard. Women generally don’t have the luxury of knowing what it is like to have facial hair, so now they can live out all of their beard fantasies!

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35 Sometimes I Like To…

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Google can be a place for people to go when they have nowhere else to turn. When you are feeling low, it is nice to know that someone else may feel the same way. Do you like to wear your stretchy pants sometimes? Well, that’s ok, most of us do. Maybe you are short, and like to pretend you are tall. There is no shame here.

You might even like to spank your dough sometimes. But, let’s be honest, we all do that. How can you not? I mean, when you are making bread and it’s rising, it’s pretty much begging you to spank it. Anyway, Google can help you work through whatever it is that you like to do sometimes.

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36 How Does…

Hilarious Google Autocomplete Fails
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It is very apparent that people don’t know how money exchanging apps work. They don’t even know how bitcoin works. Which, to be fair, bitcoin and money exchanging apps are still fairly new. But, plan B? If you’re Googling how it works, maybe you shouldn’t participate in the act that would require this medicine. Or, at the very least, use protection.

The rest of these questions, though, make sense. I mean, have you ever used an air fryer? How do those things actually work? Or, what about Wordle? Who decides what the word of the day is going to be? It’d be nice to know.

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37 Will My…

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Google is always there to answer your questions, no matter what that question is. Wondering if your phone will work in Mexico? Google has an answer for you. Will your flight get canceled? Just check Google! You can even find out if your ex will ever come back. By the way, just let them go. It’s better for everyone.

But if you lose your toenail, you might need to speak to a doctor instead. It probably depends on how the toenail was lost, but what do we know? Google will also be able to help you find out if your dog can get covid. Can dogs get covid? Be right back, heading over to Google right now!

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38 Why Does My Husband…

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If you are married, you might have a lot of questions about your husband. Why does he do the things that he does? Why is he the way that he is? Can he be fixed? Well, don’t worry, Google is here to help. Wondering why he sweats at night? Google. Why does he snore? Google. (Or maybe a doctor, probably.)

But on a more serious side, if you are asking a majority of these questions, you might need marriage counseling. Your husband should not hate you or lie to you all the time. That doesn’t seem healthy. But if he sleeps a lot, maybe he is just tired. Who knows?

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39 What Would A…Hilarious Google Searches

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Okay, most of these questions are technically alright to ask Google about. Google is filled with articles about potential wars or what a comet could do to the earth. Haven’t you always wanted to know what would happen if there was a nuclear war? No? Well, Google knows what would happen.

Google also knows many other things besides potential wars. Google knows what a pirate would bring on a date. Would a pirate bring his hook? Would he wear his eye patch? We don’t know, but Google does!

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40 What Is It Ca…

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Have you ever experienced something brand new? Maybe you don’t exactly know what it is that you are experiencing. I mean, it is a new feeling, after all. You might be wondering about something simple, like what something means in a new game that you are playing with your friends. But sometimes it is more intense than that.

You might be facing a new challenge when you can’t smell something, which has become more common after the whole Covid-19 era. But what if it’s more serious than that? What if you are hearing voices? What if you happen to like pain? Or, even more peculiar, what if a child is attracted to an adult? What is that called? Google has the answers to whichever question you are asking, whether it is relevant or not.

Victoria Pickard

Tori primarily finds herself in the marketing world. She spends her time using her creative abilities to craft content to help her clients succeed. She stays up to date with techniques and trends to help better her skills. When she is not creating content, you can find her relaxing with her dog or cleaning her apartment (which is a never-ending task!).

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